


Perfection

by Marcus_S



Category: Caprika
Genre: AU, Nudity, metaphysical speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:20:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28225278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marcus_S/pseuds/Marcus_S
Summary: This story was provoked by the fact that I have a picture on my PC rotating wallpaper of Alesandra Torresani that originally came from https://www.fanpop.com/clubs/alessandra-torresani/images/10311659/title/caprica-photo.The character of Zoe Graystone doesn't belong to me but otherwise the story is © M Stanson 2020





	Perfection

**Author's Note:**

> This story was provoked by the fact that I have a picture on my PC rotating wallpaper of Alesandra Torresani that originally came from https://www.fanpop.com/clubs/alessandra-torresani/images/10311659/title/caprica-photo.
> 
> The character of Zoe Graystone doesn't belong to me but otherwise the story is © M Stanson 2020

She has a head of jet black hair, lustrous jet black hair and it cascades down to beyond her shoulders. It’s framing a pretty little face, cheeks and a petite retroussé nose, just enough colour in the lips to make then enticing. At the moment she is stood in profile with her arms wrapped round her breasts while she holds an apple in one hand; a very red apple with a single bite making a clear pale circle in the surface. From the side there’s a nice pert bottom and clearly and equally lustrous jet black pubic bush. Below the muscles of a pair of slim legs taper to a pair of small feet with delicate little toes.

It’s not often people spontaneously get undressed in my office, even less often that those people are quite simply stunningly beautiful young women. It’s difficult to remember that I should concentrate on my job and not just sit back and enjoy the view; however that is really the case so -

“Miss Graystone, is this necessary. It’s not that I have any objection, but it is fairly unusual for my patients to behave in this way and I’m a little confused as to your purpose”.

“You need to see for yourself, otherwise you’ll not believe me”.

“OK, well I can see quite a lot, so what must I believe”. She turns round to face me and lowers her arms. The breast are as small and perfectly formed as the rest of her with pert dark nipples.

“I’m perfect, unbelievably so”.

“Well I’d certainly say you are very attractive”. It is noticeable that her skin is almost colourless, she not just ‘white’ as in Caucasian, but approaching alabaster although not in any way in a deathly, bloodless way.

“No I’m perfect, unnaturally perfect and as result I don’t believe I’m real”.

Ah now we are getting somewhere “Why do you make that connection”.

“Biology is messy, everyone knows that, the two halves of the human body don’t exactly match up. If you photograph your face, cut it in half and replicate each half you get two subtly different faces, and you’ll always prefer one to the other. Every photographer knows everyone had a good side. Well I don’t; I’ve tried, I am completely symmetrical and it goes far further down than my face. If you look at my genitals in detail”.

“I’d rather not, you being undressed in my office is a potentially unethical situation, but my investigating your genitals in detail certainly passes the acceptable mark. I’m your psychiatric counsellor not your gynaecologist”.

“Then you must take my word for it that they are also unbelievably symmetrical. As a result I seriously believe I have been drawn, modelled, however you want to put it rather than born naturally”.

“I will happily take your word for it Miss Graystone. I will agree that your statement is difficult to argue with, our perception of beauty includes the requirement for as much symmetry as possible and you are very symmetrical. Given that we have achieved that agreement, would you mind getting dressed”.

“You see that’s another thing, I’m a teenage girl, shouldn’t I have body issues, shouldn’t I be picking on any imperfection and magnifying it to generate a neurosis, not getting neurotic because I’m perfect”.

“What makes you think you are neurotic”.

“No don’t do that doctor, answer my question first”.

“Well, what you have described is certainly considered more common; however I must task the questions to avoid putting words in your mouth”.

“OK then, well I think I’m getting neurotic, because I see my perfection, not just physically but in other ways and it makes me think I cannot be a real human and must be some sort of computer generated creation”.

“In what other ways do you think you’re perfect”.

“The rest of my biology is too predictable, my monthly cycle never varies, I get exactly the same degree of cramping exactly the same amount of time before I start to bleed every month. The cramps are almost useful, they aren’t severe enough to be anything but a signal; ‘You will start to bleed in twelve hours’; I’ve never once been late, I’ve never once started early in an embarrassing way”.

“To return to your previous comment, you do appear remarkably relaxed about your body and its functions for a girl of your age. Does this perfection extend to less sexualised matters, how healthy are you, how fit”.

“I would describe my fitness as good for my size, I’m not Wonderwoman, I don’t have the breasts, nor do I have super strength or anything that’s completely unbelievable, however I’ve only ever been ill in almost predictable minor ways, I get colds apparently at random, but the effect of a cold is very repeatable, the same degree of fever, blocked sinuses, sore throat and so on”.

“So I’m accepting everything you tell me about your body, now again would you mind getting dressed”.

“Sorry yes. You know that’s the one thing that isn’t perfect; sometimes if I’m focused on one thing I forget the peripherals, like a computer being overloaded”.

“I think we all do that, the concept of the ability to multitask is I believe very overrated. Studies on people who are multitasking clearly show they are switching from one task to the other at high frequency, but that gives mental dead spots. It’s why using a phone while driving is so dangerous”. She is finally redressing. It was obvious she had this planned, the limited amount of clothing, no bra or pants, only a T-shirt, loose skirt and sandals, that she could remove within a few seconds. “Thank you, please do sit down. Just briefly I want to come back to the undressing, why was it necessary”.

“To get you focussed on the problem, so you couldn’t just go ‘Oh you’re exaggerating, like everyone else does”.

“Who would ‘everyone else’ be”.

“Parents, friends, teachers, other doctors, my GP and another shrink. Sorry that’s not nice term is it”.

“I’ve been called worse. So you feel that your perfection is an indication of some sort of perfect creation rather than the product of, and I totally agree with you in your description, ‘messy biology’”.

“Yes”.

“And this only applies to you, you don’t think others share your traits”.

“No, I think you’ve only got to look in a mirror to agree with me”.

“Fair comment; so do you have ideas as to answering the five W’s”

“Pardon”.

“Sorry, we ask five key questions and we can make them all start with W. Who, where, when, what and why; personally I prefer how to what, it makes it clear we’re dealing with action not object”.

“I see, well where is here, when is now, or I suppose I ought to say when and where I was born, but who, how and why; No I’ve no idea”.

“What’s your position on a god or gods”.

“I don’t think I’m a divine creation if that’s what you mean”.

“But you seem to think you’re some sort of creation, which seems to me to imply a creator”.

“Well yes but not like some sort of ancient deity creator, more like I’ve been computer programmed”.

“If we keep it simple isn’t that still a god figure. Two or three thousand years ago someone works out they’ve been created; they call it ‘God’ because the words ‘Computer programmer’ don’t exist. Now you understand computer programming so that’s how you think of it”.

“I see your point, but can you mix the created with the natural. I mean I believe in evolution as the explanation for ordinary people, but if I don’t see how I can have evolved then it’s almost not ‘how am I different’ but ‘why am I different’”.

“Always the most important W, the why. They say if someone can answer why six times in a row after they’ve made a statement, they probably do understand what they’re talking about. Fancy a go”.

“No, that’s why I’ve come to you, I know I don’t know why; I’m not convinced I really understand how either”.

“Well I do know of a theory that if a sentient AI can be created in a computer game environment, and we seem to think we’re close enough to know it can even if we haven’t done it ourselves yet; then there has to be a possibility that we ourselves are just a sentient AI in a computer game. In that case, you’re the ultimate upgrade, the rich kid’s character that they’ve spent more on than anyone else. Without wanting to make it appear that this is an issue, you do come from a privileged, high status background don’t you”.

“My mum and dad are both worth a mint, if that’s what you mean”.

“Pretty much yes”.

“Did your parents make their own money”.

“Largely, they weren’t dirt poor, but they have climbed a long way on their own efforts”.

“So in a game context, your parents are the result of successful play. Having succeeded with them the player has used their success to build you, the perfect next generation. You are a high performer academically”.

“In certain fields yes”,

“Which ones”

“Computer programing, it looks like it runs in the family”.

“Which is quite appropriate for a game set in a modern high tech world where you advance by being tech savvy”.

“I see, but there’s no way of proving this is there”.

“Highly unlikely, the validity of the game would require the units within it to be unaware of the actuality of the game. A science fiction writing biochemist by the name of Asimov wrote a short story once titled ‘Jokester’ in which a character worked out part of his life was an external manipulation, he was being studied like a lab rat. The moment he worked it out it went away, the experimenter moved on, that test was over. Since you have come to some conclusions and nothing has changed, maybe those conclusions are wrong”.

“Or maybe the player/tester is just waiting to see what I do next”.

“Well in that case I wouldn’t want to interfere with their experiment, I’d want to let you solve the problem yourself, unless you actually think that this is where you break down and become unable to function and I have to say you seem more intellectually curious than overwhelmed by the situation”.

“You’re ever so politely and wrapped in a lot of clever ideas, telling me to get on with my life”.

“In the end that’s all I tell the vast majority of my patients, it is after all how I live my own life. Take your perfection, embrace it, maybe don’t boast about it too much, you know how people don’t like the smug superior sort, but essentially go out and enjoy life as an intelligent beautiful young lady and see what happens. If terribly things start to happen to you come back and we can discuss them”.

“I see your point, I suppose I don’t like the idea I’m being manipulated”.

“But aren’t we all manipulated, by evolution through our heredity and then through our environment. Does it really matter if the manipulator is inanimate or not. There’s also the Russian dolls question, if they exist, who or what is manipulating your creator. If you insisted I define your problem I’d say it was the far from unique one that you’ve realised we, none of us, have a clue what’s going on. The solution to that is either to invent a god that makes you happy and believe in them or just take the existential approach and solve today’s problems today”. There was a prolonged period of silence after this.

“Put that way it’s difficult to argue. Somehow I still feel, different, isolated”.

“Ah now those things are part of a different problem, maybe a session next week”. She laughs

“You really do have an answer for everything”.

“Oh no, I have no answers at all, after all I may be part of the system set up to test you”.

“I’ll see you next week then”.

“If you wish”.

“Yes, I think I do”.

“Then speak to my secretary on the way out, it’s been a pleasure Miss Graystone”.

“Good day doctor”.

________________________________________________________________________________

Now there are clearly two endings to this story, but I haven’t a clue which is the right one so you can make up your own mind.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments, positive or negative, or I feel like I’m performing a monologue in an empty theatre.


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